- The takeaway from this episode is … that happiness will come when you are truly yourself.
- Here’s what this will do for you … start tracking your steps, so you can master lasting happiness. Your true self will emerge when writing in your journal for just 15-minutes each day.
- Here’s what I want you to do with it … start your happiness journal writing today, you will be happy you did!
NOTE: The “italic text” within this post is channeled from Linda’s Spirit Guides and Angels
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You wouldn’t have a lot of confidence in spending counterfeit money, would you?
You’d feel like a fake if you bought a knockoff counterfeit piece of jewelry or clothing, so why would you want anything to do with counterfeit happiness. With so many fakes and frauds in the world, people are on the lookout for counterfeits. Therefore, why would anyone think they could get away with counterfeiting their happiness?
Let’s take a look at happiness and pleasure.
It’s okay to desire either one, but one of them has serious negative consequences. Many people confuse the two. There’s a big difference between happiness and pleasure. Most people want to live a pleasure-oriented life, chasing all kinds of things that give them temporary pleasure … counterfeit happiness. True happiness is something that lasts a long time and is not short-lived.
True Happiness has a sustaining element to it.
People, who are in a happy marriage for 50 years never call it a pleasurable marriage, do they? … although pleasure may be a component. Here are some common examples of temporary pleasures; eating the wrong type of food, unhealthy habits, casual sex, and gossiping are just a few unhealthy temporary pleasures.
How do pleasure and happiness work together?
When you chase pleasure what you are doing to yourself is depleting the dopamine in your brain. The pleasure uses it up. On the other hand, when you are in a happy state you increase serotonin in your brain. The two balance each other out unless you seek the thrill of dopamine.
If you continue to chase pleasure … you will deplete both the dopamine and the serotonin, leaving you with a new feeling – depression. Depressed that you can’t get happy will lead to many self-destructive choices. In an attempt to chase more pleasure, people take pharmaceutical or recreational drugs for their depression, or they drink alcohol to help them forget about their lack of happiness or alleviate the stress in their life.
The key to your long-term well-being and mental health is in deciphering the difference between seeking pleasure or happiness.
What side are you on? Which chemical in your brain is suffering from being out of balance and for how long? Take a look at what you’ve done in the past. Where have you been chasing temporary pleasure? Was it worth it? What was the outcome? Was it fleeting in the moment, or did it have a residual effect for a few days?
Counterfeit happiness only fools you.
Then look at the things in your past that made you happy; like a new relationship, a new job, doing what you love to do, being in nature, service to others, following a healthy diet, and exercise routine. These all make you happy. You look back at yourself a year ago or five years ago when you followed a new healthy lifestyle, then you look at yourself now in the mirror and it makes you happy. It certainly wasn’t always pleasurable along the way. You sacrificed, you worked hard, you endured sore muscles, but you are happy with the results.
So, when you’re faced with the choice of what to do in your life now, examine if you’re seeking pleasure or happiness? Happiness is a by-product of the life you are leading; pleasure is a pursuit. It’s hard to define how happy you will be doing something until you do it. On the other hand, pursuing and chasing pleasure will always be temporary.
CALL TO ACTION: Start your Self-Examination
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Most people have been living a counterfeit life of instant gratification, don’t let that be you.
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Get to know who you are to achieve lasting happiness.
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Happiness comes when you are true to yourself – it’s a natural byproduct.
HOW IT WORKS: Many people were leading counterfeit lives, a life of instant gratification .. then came 2020. This year has exposed more fakes than any previous year and still has another four months to go. The Guides have been pointing you in a new direction for years and now you are beginning to see what they have seen all along. This is just the beginning.
Pleasure is fleeting, while happiness is constant. When you are low on dopamine it drains the serotonin. When you are living a happy life your serotonin levels are in balance along with the dopamine. However, even when you are living a happy life, instances of overstimulation will cause the dopamine to rage out of control throwing off your serotonin levels and negatively affecting you. It’s a delicate balance between these two chemicals and vital to your long-term well-being and mental health – your true and lasting happiness. ~ Linda Deir
RELATED ARTICLES:
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When Faking Positivity Reduces Stress and When It Backfires – Very Well Mind
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“Fake Happiness”: Counseling, Potentiality, and Psycho-Politics in China – Ethos
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The Paradox of Happiness: Finding True Joy in a World of Counterfeits Logos
A funny incident about pleasure and happiness comes to my mind when reading this insight. A couple of weeks ago, on a rare occasion, I had a couple of beers. I rarely drink because I do a lot of sport and drinking makes me slow. After 4(!!) lovely Belgium beers which are quite heavy on the alcohol percentage, I felt very pleasant with myself. I took the action to invite “some” people over to celebrate my birthday next week. So I started sending out messages on my phone. I looooved the reactions I received, I couldn’t count them.
I was way too pleasant with the feeling these messages (and beer) gave me. The next morning I woke up, with a heavy head and a phone full of messages. It seemed I had invited over 45 people in my TINY house for a barbecue! Wauw! That would never fit. And in these COVID-19- times impossible! I did not feel too happy about myself then.
A few days later the Dutch government announced that we are not allowed to invite more than 6 people into your house for a private party.
So, what I did is I divided my birthday weekend into time slots so that everybody can come and I can really BE with all these nice people in small groups. In the end, that solution makes me very happy.
And I will not be drinking any beer on my birthday!
I would describe these episodes as “delayed happiness.” These are examples of what we do when we have been repressed for so long – swinging too far one way or another.
Wow, this so resonates with what I have seen in my “mom” years. The purse example specifically. I never did all the pta/pfso stuff. Always seemed like people who just wanted to monologue and had nothing to do with the kids. One of the events was moms having brunch for Christmas and I would never go, but kept getting this email invite so I thought they must really want me to come. So I went. I felt super awkward and didn’t fit in. Everyone was so Fashionable. I was sitting at a table eating with a few other women and a mom holding a baby came over to sit down. There was one seat left at the table, and it was occupied by a purse. So I moved the purse to the ground and pulled the chair out so the mom with baby could sit. Man, the women all looked at me like I was insane. One woman yelled at me “do you know how much that purse costs?“ She started carefully wiping the bottom off and it wasn’t even hers. “ That’s a $1400 Luis Vuitton “! Whoa. I was shocked. Not sure if I was more shocked that no one wanted to help the mom and baby who needed a seat or that someone would spend that much on a purse. Learned my lesson. Got out of there quickly and never went to another mom thing. Now I’m processing all that and realize I spent most of my life trying to fit in with the cool groups and felt so insecure and unimportant. Like I was the one who wasn’t okay. I regret spending so much time underestimating my true self. Wow. I was right on all the time. I’ve always felt that weird feeling of not liking Or trusting those popular groups. Now I’m completely aware and awake and know it was me all along who was awake and amazing. Now I’m grateful for the knowing and the growing. Thank you for always putting those awarenesses right where I can find them.
The best part of your experience is what you came to realize – that you had it all along. The only thing that was ever missing was when you doubted yourself. You can’t see it when you’re in it, that how come you can see it now … you got through it!